Book meme! Day 21

Day 21 - Favorite romantic/sexual relationship (including asexual romantic relationships)

I adore Venetia and Damerel [in Georgette Heyer's Venetia] because I adore Venetia.  I suspect that, absent Venetia, Damerel would not be anything I cared for.  His best characteristic is that he knows how awesome she is, and that's... not all that awesome, actually.  

I tend to really like Barbara Hambly's couples and believe in their romances.

I guess it's odd because I read a lot of romance and romantic fantasy, but I don't tend to believe in the happily ever after for most of those couples.  I could never see how Aragorn and Arwen were going to make a go of it living together and her being around while he had to cut his toenails.  I suppose they would have had separate suites.  I like Jennifer Crusie's romances in great part because I believe that they will make it together, but I believe in their compatibility and their commitment more than I believe in the romantic sweep of their love.

I love Richard and Alec [in Ellen Kushner's Swordspoint], but theirs strikes me as a romance made up of great moments - fabulous nights and weekends but a bit uncomfortable day to day.

Ok, here it is, actually...most of my favorite romantic relationships are in comics.  The Tulip / Jesse thing in Preacher [by Garth Ennis and Steve Dillon]?  Stabs me to the heart.  I tend to think of it as pretty similar to Kit/John [in the Garth Ennis / Steve Dillon run on Hellblazer] except in a world that gives them 2nd chances until they've changed enough to make it work.  And Strangers in Paradise?  It's more of a web of relationships than a single relationship, but I believe in it.  I believe that Francine and Katchoo will figure it out eventually and make it work - and that that could happen for them only in a world filled the history and network of their friends and their friends' relationships. 

( Book meme list )

Getting Older - the to-do list

One of the things that I have noticed, at least in our culture for people who didn't need to work for survival as adolescents (two HUUUUUUGE assumptions) is that there are some qualitative differences between the to-do lists of adolescence and of adulthood.

Basically, my impression is that the to-do list of at least early adolescence is finite - you can reach a point in a day/week/month/year when you have crossed off all your responsibilities.
And the to-do list of an adult is infinite.  You make progress, but the nature of your responsibilities is that there will always be more.

I suppose it's possible that this is true of adolescence as well, but I don't recall it - I was aware of tons of things crashing down on me, but I usually didn't have the right to controle them and thus didn't have the responsibility of responding to them.  I remember feeling that if I had bathed/cleaned the house/done my homework/applied to colleges/ gotten a job - then I was done until the next wave.

Whereas in adulthood I am able to have a voice in what happens next, but that means I must be engaged in the next-ness all the time - I can choose where I live but it is my responsibility to come up with rent money or mortgage money and to buy cleaners and to save for home repairs.  I can go to the dentist or not go to the dentist but then I must budget the money and try to buy the dental insurance etc.

So it's not that the change is bad per se, because having the right to choose is pretty great.  But it's still a big change.